Battersea Power Station, London, Wimbledon Screen

This week I did a crazy thing. I flew to London to go to Wimbledon without a ticket to see “the tennis”!

Okay, so you can guess that one of my passions is tennis.

When have you jumped into life and followed your passion?

It might be as simple as baking a loaf of bread, or painting a picture, or walking in a special place, or… you name it… it’s your passion of course!

‘A British friend was in town, and we began talking about tennis. He said “Come and queue up. We do it and we get in!”

I thought, Wow, how crazy! spend a fortune on a plane ticket with no guarantee!

However, I do have a friend to guide me through the process, so I have a more than 50% chance!

After a couple of people said- “DO IT! It’s a chance of a lifetime!” I started planning the trip, added a couple of days in Bath, planned to meet another friend in London on the last day, and I booked it!

The Crescent, Bath, England

Here’s what I learned:

• The most amazing things can happen when you leap outside of your comfort zone.

I’m a big leaper in that way but this was different- filled with things I wouldn’t; ordinarily do, even while leaping, and everything turned out extraordinarily well.

• Following my passion led me to pure relaxation and joy in each moment even beyond the tennis part of the adventure.

Andy Murray, Center Court, Wimbledon

Yes, I got into Wimbledon each day and even got into Center Court to see Andy Murray play, watch the touching tribute in person, and feel the deep love the crowd has for him.

• Taking advantage of following my intuition each day on where to go and what to see, made the trip pure ease.

The road well-traveled can have lovely twists and turns if you listen to your heart. Seeing the important sites and adding some curiosity helped manifest a fun and truly relaxing adventure.

And I’m even excited about going home!

What I’ve learned is that following your passion is the best way to feel joy, to be truly relaxed and completely awake.

What’s your passion? Tell me all about it!

Comment below.

Want to dig deeper into aligning with your true passionate self? Get on the list for the Beta of my online Luminous Living course.  And yes, we get to chat live!

With love and passion,
Liz

So many people have experienced change over the past year – myself included. From scary medical procedures to moving cities. So how do we all remain resilient in the midst of major upheaval whether it is personal, familial, governmental, or cultural?

For me, and what I teach all my clients – coaching, psychotherapy, and corporate – is that when we begin to feel like a leaf in the wind, we are sunk. That’s not the good part, the meaty part. That is the human condition. So, what to do about it? Here’s a tip that is part of my QPT® (Quantum Presence Technique) process and is a quick way to get centered.

1. Breathe and put your attention on your feet.

That’s what I do, and that’s what I teach because it’s impossible to handle any stress, big or small, if you are not present in your body. Putting your attention on your feet and breathing is a shortcut to getting back to home base- You, your own body.

Emotion follows thought.

Have you ever noticed that when you have a seed, just a little seed of information that is or could be true, suddenly the brain is off and running with a story about it? Depending on your inclination that could be scary or wonderful. Either way, it is just a story.

It is not true because it has not happened. You notice I didn’t say “happened yet”. That’s because there is no yet under these circumstances. We actually have no idea what is going to happen.

When we are present in our bodies, we are not being run wild by our thoughts and the emotions that follow our storyline. We can actually make a clear choice about who we are and what we want to choose to feel and do in the moment.

2. Make an Inspired Choice

What makes an inspired choice? The first is step is # 1 above. When you are experiencing presence, full embodiment, you are connected mind, body, spirit, and heart. You realize that you are safe in this moment and that you have come into your body fully with your attention and your breath. You may have a sense of solidity, of feeling grounded, connected to the earth. It comes from having made the decision to be still and notice that gravity is holding you steady. Your intention is all you need to experience the pause that allows you to make choices from your true self, unimpaired by extraneous thoughts.

From this position you can activate the ‘you’ ‘you know is there. The ‘you’ that is not a leaf in the wind. The ‘you’ that you can depend on. It is the same ‘you’ that you’ve depended on when making important decisions, helping someone in crises. All aspects of you working together to take your next step. That is how an inspired choice is made.

Try it. Let me know what happens. Is there more to this? Of course, but this is a great place to start.

For a bit more guidance, click the video below:

The most transformative moments in our lives are those moments when all of a sudden something important is illuminated.

When we have those big Aha’s!

The trigger could be a simple or profound insight, or a life-changing event – like a birth or a death, a marriage or a divorce – or the trigger could even be an experience like the one we might have standing on top of a mountain for the first time.

What we are feeling is ALIVENESS!

And it is in these trigger moments, good or bad, that we actually are the most alive. We feel a certain type of energy in the air. We feel the skin on our body and the beating of our heart. We feel totally connected.  We are present in the moment. It’s electric – it’s what some call a peak experience. Because in those moments and during those life events we know we are really HERE! It’s visceral!

And that’s just it, we feel these peak experiences so intensely because, during them, we are smack dab in the middle of the power of life.

What’s happening the rest of the time?

We’re still alive, of course, doing our thing, going through the motions, perhaps even fairly consciously.

But what if every moment in our lives or at least lots more of them felt just as electric as a peak experience? What if we were fully tuned in far more of the time? What if we could have that heightened “electricity-in-the-air experience” all the time?

I remember when my son was born. We were given a book titled “On the Day You Were Born”. It showed every aspect of nature, on our own planet earth, and our own planet in motion with everything else –  the entire universe. And all of it was welcoming our baby into life … into the world, into the motion of everything … into the flow.

It was such an exciting feeling to see these connections so clearly in that pivotal moment.  We are all part of the flow. We ARE the flow.

Everything is connected, and everyone affects all things at all times.

Those momentous peak experiences simply remind us of this fact. But in reality, we are always in the flow. And even more, we are directing it all the time.

We just don’t know it or notice it.

But here’s the thing:

We DO have the ability to be present to that connection daily. And WOW! What an opportunity that is.

To wake up, grab our life force, and really show up in our lives. No matter what we are doing. To take off the filters that cloud our connection and, with the intention of being fully present, step into the aliveness of the moment.

And intention is all it takes to begin to learn how to feel that aliveness every day and to learn how to keep that feeling going.

Here are some simple ways to practice …

Right now, as you’re listening to me, notice if your brain has taken you to the next item on your to-do list, taken you away from being where you actually are in this very moment. Are you here? Or are you thinking about what’s next? Or what happened earlier today?

In order to be present in this moment, I’d like you to do a quick experiment. First, find your feet. And put all of your attention/concentration in your feet. Feel them. I’m doing it too. Second, Feel your feet connected to the floor or ground. And now BREATHE … breathe all the way into your feet … and, as you do, feel your breath move through the rest of your body.

Perfect! Thank you for doing that with me. You are now in your body. And once you are in your body you are on the road to being present.

The more you breathe into your feet and feel that you are actually connected to the earth, the more the rest of your body will start to show up too. Because what you are doing is taking your energy and attention out of your head and bringing it home into your physicality – into your physical being … into the present moment. And it only takes a minute.

Once we are in our bodies we can really see where we are. Our focus is fully on what is around us, our vision is zeroed in on the now.

Our culture makes multi-tasking seem attractive, but when we are doing one thing and thinking about another, or doing multiple things at once, it’s pretty hard to breathe and be in your body … and, therefore, it’s difficult to truly feel alive or to simply enjoy the present experience of being fully engaged in a task.

To build on the exercise we just did and help you become even more present, walk around the room you are in or, if you are outside, even better.

First, connect to your feet, take a breath, and walk slowly forward. As you do, feel your footsteps … the bottoms of your feet connecting to and releasing their connection with the floor or earth. Then, as you walk, begin to name aloud or silently to yourself every object or being you see, taking each in fully.

Really notice what is around, you …

The lamp with the burlap shade, the wooden table, the striped cat, the woman with the red coat, the mirror with the gilded frame, the crazy patterned pillow, the tree fallen in the path.

With every object or being you name as you walk, you will become more and more present to the moment, more and more grounded … feeling more and more alive.

For those of you who feel anxious from time to time – this exercise alone is a great anxiety reducer. Again, just a few minutes spent doing this exercise will make a world of difference.

We’ve all heard the phrase, “stop and smell the roses.” And most of us take that saying as a caution to slow down, to take the time to enjoy life, to stop doing too much. It might be just the ticket.

It’s good advice at times… and it may sound a lot like what I’m talking about – but it’s not.

And perhaps it’s not the most helpful advice for today’s fast-paced world or in times of real stress.

We need to realize that at whatever speed we’re moving, no matter what is happening – good or bad – and regardless of how much we have on our plates, we can and need to be fully present and we want to feel fully alive.

Aliveness has nothing to do with stopping. It has nothing to do with how much we have going on. If we stop to smell the roses, we might not actually be smelling them if we’re thinking about what we have to do next.

And in fact, sometimes the most alive we feel is when we’re moving at lightning speed …

As long as we stay in the present.

So, don’t stop and smell roses … instead learn how to get into the present regardless of how fast you’re moving or what is happening (and yes you may need to slow down to do that at first), but after you practice and learn it …

Move fast, move slow, do a lot, do a little, take breaks, get back to it … and through it all … BE PRESENT … LIVE YOUR WHOLE LIFE IN THAT ZONE – fully connected, fully in the flow, fully alive.

I was speaking with someone today who was sharing the feeling of being scared while talking about separating from her husband. She did have trepidation about separation and divorce but what really frightened her was the response she was getting from the people around her to the potential dissolution of marriage. The responses were so strongly negative and unsupportive, that she thought that they must be afraid of something.

She was excited that I had started a private Facebook group to discuss a new way to deal with divorce because she said that people forget about “that part.” When I asked what she meant, she said that people forget about the part leading up to separation or divorce; that people forget that the individuals involved need support. The story she was telling me highlighted that bystanders will often express their own opinions instead of listening.

It’s sad that when someone is looking for support in the fragile moments of making the huge decision to explore the dissolution of a marriage that what shows up is fear or judgment by others.

The world of divorce is often fraught with so much negativity one can’t see the forest for the trees. The potential outcome is often the focus so people forget how important all the steps in the process are. If friends and family are only focused on the outcome, the couple may feel like they are floundering in a sink or swim effort during the early stages of decision-making.

It’s easy to forget how shocking it can be when someone says something out of the blue that’s a real zinger and knocks you off balance. Listening to her was an important reminder that a good support system is critical.

Much of my work is with people who are in the process of making the decision to separate or divorce or those who have already made the decision and my job is guiding them through more positive ways to approach their situation. Part of this involves talking about the people in their lives who have a lot to say about the dissolution of marriage – whether it’s sharing war stories or giving advice or offering words of approval or disapproval. Since they are not part of the couple, their situation may not apply.

I am so involved in the arena of giving those divorcing the support they need that I can forget how many people don’t reach out for professional support, or how many people go ahead with this very difficult life change without the support of their family or friends, simply because of how their family and friends may feel about divorce in general.

I don’t think anyone goes down the road of divorce lightly. If someone has gotten to the point of deciding to leave a relationship for a period time or has made the decision alone or with their spouse to end the union, they are jumping into the unknown. To take that leap there is, most often, a very good reason. How great it would be if co-workers, friends and family members could remain neutral or supportive.

Often people who are making a major life decision do find that it is a bit frightening to those around them. In the case of divorce, the observer may be afraid they will have to take sides or be involved in the “fight” in some way. They may be afraid for the person or the couple’s children because so many divorces are antagonistic. They may remember their own break ups or their parent’s break ups. They find themselves looking at their own relationships and sometimes they become afraid for themselves.

Dissolution of marriage is a tricky process. It shakes the foundations of many belief systems.

But maybe it is more important to recognize that all people deserve to be in relationships that are healthy for them and sometimes it just isn’t so.

My heart went out to the person who felt she had to do this on her own. It was clear she had good reason to make this difficult decision. I hope that those around her help strengthen her resolve or simply stand by her side without judgment.